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Okay, obviously this post is for the single ladies, but many of the same principles could apply to single guys who want to pray for their future wives! (On behalf of females everywhere, you are awesome.)
I first heard someone talk about praying for her future husband when I was a kid. It sounded like a good idea, but I was scared I’d pray for the wrong things and later change my mind, so at the time I decided it was better not to pray, lest I get exactly what I asked for and regret asking. (My tendency to worry and overthink things began at a young age. Haha.)
Enter the Christy Miller series. Like many young evangelical girls, I grew up reading these books about a teenage girl navigating faith, friendships, and relationships. As a young teen, she begins thinking about how she can prepare for and honor her future husband, even before she marries him. She writes letters to him, prays for him, and considers her future with him as she makes decisions as a single person.
Despite my fear of messing up the whole prayer thing, I recognized the wisdom in this, and so did many other girls. The author of the series, Robin Jones Gunn, started something of a movement when she wrote the Christy Miller books, which eventually led to her publishing a book with Tricia Goyer titled Praying for Your Future Husband.
This book is one of the best resources I’ve found when it comes to praying for your future spouse. Although it’s targeted more toward teenagers, I first read it in my 20s, and I still found it to be a worthwhile read. It’s filled with wisdom, stories of waiting and answered prayers, and – the best part – a section of 52 prayers to pray over your future husband, one for each week of the year.
By the time I read this book, I had realized God was probably smart enough to answer the right prayers and toss out the wrong ones, so I’d been consistently praying for my future husband for a few years. I didn’t always know exactly what to pray, though. I’d mostly pray three things: 1) that God would show me who the right guy was; 2) that he would keep my future husband safe, healthy, and pure; and 3) that my husband would have a great day and be blessed.
The prayers in this book were a game-changer, though. They’re much better words than I could’ve come up with – they’re God’s own, taken straight from his Word! I’ve attempted to pray through the list each year since, and what has worked best for me is to set up each prayer as a recurring event on Google Calendar to remind me what to pray each week, every year.
If you want to pray through these Scriptures, too, here’s a pinnable graphic with all 52 prayers. I also highly recommend reading the book that goes along with them!
(P.S. I think these can be great things to pray over other guys in your life, too – brothers, nephews, dads, etc.!)
So what else can you pray for when it comes to your future husband? Another good resource is your List. You know, The List – of all the qualities and attributes you desire in a husband. You may have one written down or maybe your list is just in your head, but I think these qualities are also fair game when it comes to praying over your future husband. God knows the desires of your heart because he put them there, so go ahead and pray for what you want!
Inner character and personality traits are especially important, but that doesn’t mean you can’t pray about physical characteristics, too. One of my friends is originally from Cambodia and she always prayed for a tall guy with blond hair and blue eyes. She’s super short so everybody would laugh when she’d declare that was the kind of guy she was going to marry…and sure enough, a few years later she met her tall Scandinavian and they’ve been married over 10 years now! He’s about twice her height. 😂 You can’t tell me that God doesn’t answer our prayers, even the most specific ones!
But don’t just pray about what you want the guy to look like. What do you want your marriage to look like? What kind of characteristics are important to you? Integrity, intellect, honesty, wisdom, a sense of humor? Pray for those things.
Consider your own goals and passions, too. Are you called to be a pastor? Pray for God to send someone whose calling fits with yours. Do you want kids? Pray for a guy who also wants kids and who will be a good dad.
Finally, pray that God will bring the right guy into your life at the right time, and pray that God will confirm to you that he’s the one. God’s timing is perfect, and he knows how to speak to us! We just need to seek him and listen to what he’s saying.
Okay, I’ve shared some of the things that I think are worth praying about. Now it’s your turn! Ladies – single, married, or at any stage of life – what would you add to the list? What are you praying over your future husband? What did you pray (and how did God answer)? What do you wish you’d prayed? Share your wisdom below! Next week I’m going to compile a huge list of things to pray for, so this is your chance to contribute!
Praying for Your Future Husband by Robin Jones Gunn and Tricia Goyer
The Christy Miller Collection, Vol. 1 by Robin Jones Gunn
The Christy Miller Collection, Vol. 2 by Robin Jones Gunn
The Christy Miller Collection, Vol. 3 by Robin Jones Gunn
The Christy Miller Collection, Vol. 4 by Robin Jones Gunn
10 Books All Single Ladies Should Read