Make the Decision Ahead of Time

We all know people who struggle with restraint when it comes to food. (We all probably know what it’s like to be those people, too, at least on some level.) Whether it’s binge eating, yo-yo dieting, or indulging in a few too many “cheat days,” the desired results just never seem to manifest.

Even in cases where doctors have issued stern warnings, oftentimes people still can’t muster up the discipline to change. When I hear of these struggles, sometimes I want to shout, “Just don’t buy the dang Twinkies! Don’t stroll down that aisle in the grocery store! Don’t even go to the grocery store – get your groceries delivered, if that’s what it takes!”

Though I’m not claiming it’s easy, the path forward seems clear: if the problem is an inability to resist treats when they’re right in front of you, the solution is to make sure those items are never nearby. A decision must be made ahead of time not to purchase the items. To not even walk through the door of the store that sells them, if that’s what it takes.

Here’s the very simple truth: If the forbidden items aren’t in front of you, you won’t be able to partake.

I think this can be a good metaphor for staying away from sin of any kind.

Many of us don’t make the decision ahead of time to stay out of sin. We get close to the line (walking down the junk food aisle, so to speak), hoping we’ll make the right choice when it comes down to it, and then we’re surprised when we cross the line we didn’t plan to cross. The solution isn’t to exercise greater willpower in the moment; it’s to not get that close to the line in the first place!

In today’s generation, I especially see this play out in the area of sexual immorality. People tell themselves they aren’t going to violate the biblical principles they believe in, but they end up crossing the line anyway, because they didn’t abide by any real boundaries. Never once have I heard someone who crossed the line say they had a rule to never be in a house alone with a member of the opposite sex. Never once have I heard them say they set a curfew (i.e. No hanging out after 10:00 p.m.) and stuck to it. Never once have I heard a couple who crossed the line say they only hung out in groups or that the only place they spent time together was at church.

Nope. Not surprisingly, what I’ve heard instead is that they got in the habit of staying too late at the other’s house. They often spent time alone with no chaperones. They didn’t have any accountability; nobody knew where they were or who they were with. They hung out in bars or other environments that don’t exactly broadcast a message of purity.

Just like the food scenario, sometimes I want to scream, “Don’t go to bars, for goodness’ sake! Don’t hang out at night when no one else is around! Don’t hang out alone at all, if that’s what it takes to stick to your convictions!”

The Bible says to “flee from sexual immorality.” It doesn’t say, “Try really hard not to give in.” It says, “Flee.”

Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body. Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies.

1 Corinthians 6:18-20 NIV

“Flee” is a strong word. It doesn’t paint a picture of lounging around your boyfriend’s house until midnight when you find yourself too tired and weak to leave. To “flee” is to run in the opposite direction. To take off before temptation even arises to do something you’re determined not to do.

“Fleeing” is not spending time with bad influences and hoping for the best, hoping they don’t rub off on you because surely you will be the one to influence them. (Spoiler alert: this is not usually the way it works.)

“Fleeing” is not hanging around a bar where flowing drinks remove inhibitions and sexually-charged music pulses through the speakers, stirring up emotions.

“Fleeing” probably isn’t watching R-rated romantic comedies while snuggled up in the dark with someone you have feelings for.

“Fleeing” isn’t getting as close as physically possible to the line without crossing it; fleeing is turning around and running the other way like your life depends on it.

The word “flee” is used in another popular Bible verse:

Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Come near to God and he will come near to you.

James 4:7-8 NIV

These are God’s promises to you: “Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Come near to God, and he will come near to you.”

You flee from sin; the devil flees from you.

Nobody ever said it was easy, but you can make it much easier on yourself by making the decision ahead of time. What are you going to do and not do? Don’t flirt with the line! You won’t cross it if you never get near it. Flee!

If you’ve messed up before, start fresh! Just like with your eating habits or anything else, you can forgive yourself, ask for God’s forgiveness, and begin again, this time making better choices. It’s never too late to turn your life around – in any area of your life.

What will it take for you to stick to your convictions? You don’t have to be the most disciplined person who ever lived; just choose to make the decision ahead of time instead of in the moment.

What boundaries are you willing to set now, ahead of time? Are you willing to do whatever it takes?

Flee.